Most agree that porn is bad but few attempt to articulate why. It's one of those memes you're supposed to just agree with. Porn icky. Porn bad. Porn make everything bad. Yes porn bad. Why porn is bad is not what most people want to hear. If you agree that porn is bad then you also agree a priori that locking a woman you're attracted to in a basement, chaining her to the radiator as your sex slave and feeding her nothing but Gatorade (if she behaves) is good. Which way, very online Twitter anon?
Porn isn't bad because it's a woman doing sexual things on camera. Porn isn't bad because you're being removed from reality and "experiencing" sex digitally. That isn't good, but that isn't why porn is bad. Porn is bad because you are not feeling demonic attraction for a woman who is right in front of you during the act of watching porn. Porn is bad for the same reason that fucking a woman you're not attracted to is bad. Porn is bad for the same reason most marriages are bad. Porn is settling, porn is lowering your standards, porn is giving up.
Some people have interpreted my first essay as simply saying that people should be fucking more in general (they should), but many interpreted it to mean that they should fuck anyone. I would never, ever promote such a thing. I strongly believe in quality over quantity. And no, by quality I do not mean if the woman you want to fuck went to church this week. If she prayed today. I mean: Is she hot. Are you demonically attracted to her. Does she drive you fucking crazy. When you think about her, does your dick start to get hard. Does your mind go to sick places. Do you get excited and a little nervous when she texts you back. Do you want to kill yourself if she takes more than 2 minutes to respond. Do you have to stop yourself from saying the most vile shit ever, or do you just say it anyway because you want to turn her on, you make her want to feel wanted. If any of those things are happening, then we're talking about quality.
Focusing on quantity is not good. It is really not that hard for a man with a strong sex drive who can hold a conversation and make women laugh to have sex with a lot of women. It really isn't. Why? Because most women are incredibly stressed out, underfucked, and most of them are fat now. Also most men are also gay now. If you want to focus on quality, show up to a packed bar around 1am. Most groups of hot girl friends has a fat friend, or at least a friend that isn’t as hot as them. No one has talked to that girl all night. She’s been watching dudes hit on her hot friends while she stands there and sips her drink. She’s horny and desperate. All you need to do is just stand within their general vicinity, give her one compliment about how she looks and you'll probably take her home.
That is nothing to be proud of. Yes, you are technically increasing the Fuck Rate, but fucking fat girls hits you with a discounted multiplier of 0.5. If you fucked 10 hot girls your whole life then fucked a fat girl -- congratulations, you can now tell your friends you fucked 10.5 girls.
There are different levels of intimacy. The ideal level of intimacy is demonic attraction, followed by openness, feeling vulnerable and actually getting to know a woman. The worst type of intimacy is using a woman’s body to cum in her because she’s letting you.
Let’s talk about what’s ridiculous about ‘nofap’. Yes, avoiding jerking off is good. Yes, it will retain your vitality. But also, if you go long enough without cumming, you will start to lose your mind. You will become agitated. Also, you are going to die. You may die today. What kind of life is it to be walking around with cum coming out of your eyes and chimping out at everyone around you because you’re ‘saving your vitality’ for months, with nowhere to direct it. You’re saving it for what, exactly? If you’re saving it for a specific event, let’s say something sports-related, then yes, it’s very important. If a girl you want to fuck is coming over in 3 days and you want to give her everything you’ve got, then yes, this is good, but you also might cum quicker than you want. The point is, sometimes you need to release the valve. Sometimes you need to cum just to feel sane. ‘Post-Cum Clarity’ is extremely real. Don’t get memed too hard on Twitter.
Jerking off to porn is generally very bad. It leaves you with a gross feeling afterwords, like you just debased yourself. It’s an empty feeling; no one likes it. Especially when you know how it feels to cum inside of a woman you’re insanely attracted to. If you don’t know what that’s like, then jerking off to porn might feel good because it’s all you know. I suspect this is the root of porn addiction; people who have never felt a woman’s warmth but feel tremendous satisfaction from cumming when a digital woman who has no idea who you are is present. Sure, better than nothing I guess, but that’s a very bad cycle and demotivating for a man who doesn’t get out into the world and get experience with actual women.
Let’s talk about what is good about porn that no one talks about. Porn can teach you things about fucking. ‘Real’ porn is quite rare. Most of it is staged, gay, and fake. The women’s tits are rididuclously fake and the guy injected things into his dick to last for hours with multiple women at a time. But there is porn out there where one men is actually driving one women insane and you need to know what this looks like and feels like in real life to tell the difference. Manual Ferrara, a French porn star, is an absolute behemoth in bed. He knows how to drive women insane and is completely lost in it. He’s there with them and they have no choice but to be there with him. Every woman he fucks he alphawidows. Some of them are crying as he’s fucking them because he’s existentially demolishing them in real time. Watching this kind of porn can make you better at fucking. I don’t recommend fapping to it. Powerful exercise, to watch good porn for a few minutes then walk away without jerking off. It’s a good motivator and it shouldn’t be done often.
Great article, just my feedback.
When you do NoFap in the short term, that's generally very beneficial, but once you go long term (different limit for different people, but like 30+ days for me), you enter a 'dormant' mode regarding your libido. It's very similar to fasting, most people will go crazy not eating for 48 hours but once you cross that limit, you enter this 'fasting' phase where your hunger goes into dormancy. Eventually it does wake up (like 3-4 weeks later, because you need to eat to survive) and hunger comes back with vengeance.
Similarly, the first peak happens (around 30 day into it), and you feel like you wanna fuck anything or anybody. I was messaging monstrosities and abominations on dating sites, just to get a chance to be able to nut (without masturbation). Then a certain serenity takes over, and the brain starts to work in a long-term perspective. It helped me get out of my rut, raised my testosterone levels baseline enough that I would talk to girls, ask them out on dinner, and try to take them to my place. Rejection had NO EFFECT on me (thanks to higher baseline testosterone, probably), whereas earlier it would have killed me.
Eventually it helped me increase my fuck rate, gain enough experience to find the girl perfect for me. The experience was totally different when I tried it as a committed man. 2 weeks of NoFap and you enter a low-libido depression. Overall my opinion about masturbation is that it is like it is a lot like being a responsible gun owner. You may get to use your gun in real life, but you should still go to the range regularly and practice. Don't make it all about the range though and do go out and face real danger.
One more thing which I learned from my NoFap experiences is that you shouldn't always fap to 8-9.5 women, rather making yourself fap to fat/ugly/old girls (esp after your NoFap session) enhances your enjoyment of the real women, rather than making your brain feel jaded because the real life will feel better than the fantasy. Ofc you can't just keep doing it. After few days move up to the more attractive girls, then few days of NoFap, rinse and repeat.
Thank you G