Ask Me Anything - 4/22/24
Living in the suburbs, advice for virgins, God, shit tests, first date ideas, heartbreak, foot fetishes.
Yesterday I posted a NGL link to ask me anything and received ~50 questions in under an hour. I had to delete the link unfortunately as I got bombarded by trolls and faggots. I answered all of the questions as promised and divided them into 3 types: what’s my take on ___, advice and personal questions.
What’s My Take On ____
What do you think of having kids early 20s as young man?
Age isn’t the most important variable. There are more important things to check for. Can you afford to have children? Is your financial life in order for the foreseeable future? Are you in a relationship with a woman you’re very attracted to? Do you two have good communication? Can you solve problems together easily? Does she trust you to take the lead? Does she respect you? Do you genuinely enjoy spending the majority of your time with her? Has your relationship been tested? Meaning, have you gone through hardship and the volatility of life together? Do you think you’d be a good father? Do you think she’d be a good mother? I don’t romanticize the idea of settling down early because most people don’t have their lives together by that point, especially now, let alone know what they want in someone else or who they become when they’re in a relationship.
Med, what makes for a great ass?
Plump, shape, lack of cellulite, proportion to the rest of her body. This is all a matter of personal taste but a nice ass is a “you know it when you see it” situation. If a woman asked this, I’m sorry if this answer isn’t very helpful.
Signs a woman is using you for validation instead of actual attraction?
If she doesn’t seem obsessed with you or isn’t willing to meet you / spend time with you in person.
Why do foot fetishes exist?
Feet and a man’s dick occupy adjacent areas of the somatosensory cortex, the part of the brain that processes touch. So when men feel pleasure (masturbate or have sex), there’s a chance something in their brain crosses wires with the part that processes feet and they associate pleasure with them. That’s the most I know about it and I’m happy my brain is not inflicted with this glitch.
Thoughts about spirituality, 'Enlightenment', etc.? Is it bullshit or is there something in there?
I believe in God and I pray often. I believe God answers your prayers when you are vulnerable and ask him for help with things you feel powerless over, such as an addiction or a very personal flaw. He does it on his own time and is usually revealed in a mysterious way. I don’t think God respects blaming or self-pity. I believe God responds to you after you humble yourself to him.
A man will never develop an iron frame with respect to women until he's had a soft harem at some point in his life. Why is this so true, senpai? Elaborate
Talking to multiple women at once helps you handle yourself with other women because you’re throwing yourself into the chaos that is female nature and you begin to get used to handling it. You also prevent yourself from focusing too much on one girl, sitting around waiting for her to text back or overthinking what you’re going to say.
The fact that women DEFLECT answering the question "how many bodies you have" tells you that it matters. Dating and fucking a low body count girl whom you can mould into whoever you want is a universal flex and it's a huge tell on anyone who disagrees. Why do we deny the importance of body count?
I don’t think much about body count. It’s a waste of time in the world we live in. Women are single for longer now and they’re going to have sex. The question is less about quantity and more about quality. Does she respect herself? Will she sleep with just any guy or does she hold high standards for herself? You can’t know this and you shouldn’t. I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to ask a girl for her body count (she will not tell you the real number) nor should she know yours. It’s nobody’s business and no one benefits by knowing that number. Whether or not you actually like spending time with her and have good chemistry together is far more important. Being a purist or an ideologue is incompatible with living in the real world. I talk about this in more detail here.
Can you go over some early signs of emotionally unavailable women? Also, some thoughts on men being far too self-critical when things don't work with a woman would be appreciated (I'm guilty of this).
A woman is emotionally unavailable if her heart is with another man or if she lacks capacity to feel due to an extremely traumatic childhood. The former is more often the case.
When you’re being too self-critical or have high anxiety in general, it’s good to write your feelings down and to try to be as objective as possible in what you’re assessing. Writing in a stream-of-consciousness way, meaning writing what is going on in your head in that moment or on a given problem you’re having, can help clear out the cobwebs and help you discern between what is coming from that part of yourself that is extremely critical (everyone has it) and the reality of the situation. If you can write down what actually happened (meaning, it can be proven) and separate that from your feelings or your own interpretation of it, it can go a long way to help you not be so hard on yourself.
What's an uncommonly known shit test that women give men?
I don’t know which shit tests are commonly known when it comes to this because men fail them so often. Women are constantly sizing up men to reevaluate if they’re worthy to pass on their DNA. A shit test is a woman testing your ability to tell her no. A woman giving you a shitty attitude is a shit test. If a woman is talking to her ex-boyfriend and lets you know about it, that’s a shit test. If she asks you if it’s okay to get coffee with him, that’s a nuclear shit test.
It isn’t exactly in the realm of shit tests, but I notice that a lot of men don’t realize that oftentimes when a woman asks a man for his opinion on something, she really just wants him to make the decision for her. So if she’s trying on 3 different outfits that all look the same to you, just pick one and tell her you like that best. She just wants to unload the pressure of making a decision onto you.
Thoughts on Lily James as she looked in Netfix's 'The Dig'?
Looking at this picture, she’s cute. She would look hotter without the glasses. Great lips too.
Why is facefucking girls so satisfying? Is it because it feels different from a regular blow, the dominance, or a mix of both or some secret third thing
It’s satisfying because of the dominance and degradation. In terms of how it feels, an actual blowjob feels better. Facefucking is less about pleasure and more about dominance. The girl has to be into it also. I also think guys make a bigger deal about facefucking than it warrants. There’s other ways to be dominant in bed.
Do you agree that there's nothing new under the sun with respect to PUA/ seduction? It's just the same stuff all over again, with different perspectives, ways of putting things with words, etc
I don’t know because I haven’t read any of it. But from what I can see most of the PUA guys on X who have huge accounts and sell Gumroad courses tend to have horrific takes and seem to only be focused on getting laid and have a very childish, odd and hostile understanding of women. They appear scared to me. It all feels very short-term and superficial and it has little to do with intimacy and chemistry. Memorizing formulas to handle social dynamics can work in the short-term but it doesn’t teach you anything about yourself. That requires taking risk and being vulnerable and that’s not something you can teach in a course. The most I can do is write about what I know based on general principles that appear to be universal.
Why do they say "Doggy is for fucking but missionary is for making love"?
It’s mostly a meme. Every position can be unbelievable with someone you have amazing chemistry with.
My professor said Physiognomy is a racist, pseudoscience. Is there some truth to it all?
Yes, generally, physiognomy is very real. When you see a man with “Reddit face”, chances are you can predict most of his political opinions and disposition in life. Same goes for men with Gayface or Cuckface. When a white liberal woman in her 30’s has no upper lip, she is probably hateful towards life itself and wants to burn it all down. Her mother did poison her while she was in the womb after all (they have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome). A professor probably isn’t going to admit or even know something like that.
What are good first date ideas? What are bad first date ideas?
Her first impression of you is made on the first date. And you have little control over how she’s going to perceive you. So it’s good to both be authentic while being realistic about the assumptions women make about men. If you take a girl on a walking date, she’s either going to think you’re broke or you don’t want to have sex with her. She isn’t going to feel wanted. There’s no room for intimacy or an opportunity for things to escalate physically on a walking date. Same goes for a coffee date.
I see a first date as my time to see if her and I have chemistry, if I like talking to her and if she’s interesting enough to spend 3-4 hours with for future dates. If you can’t stand being around a girl for that long, you shouldn’t see her for a second date or have sex with her. Ghosting isn’t good. Alcohol loosens people up and gives you both the chance to open up a bit more, be silly, get to know each other and have fun. And of course alcohol lowers inhibitions. It’s better for both to have their guards lowered. Life is short.
Dinner feels like overkill for a first date to me. You’re sitting across from each other and it can feel like an interview. But if you don't have a fake ID yet then dinner is the best option.
That’s me though. If you think of something fun to do, then you can do that too. Walking isn’t fun. Drinking coffee isn’t fun. A first date should be fun.
Favorite "pick up artist" or recommended "game" technique. Plus what are your general thoughts on "Game" altogether.
I don’t think about it in this way. The whole idea of “game” and “PUA tricks” keeps men in their minds. They end up coming off as too cerebral and, yes, “weird” or “creepy.” They aren’t actually connecting with a girl. It doesn’t come off as authentic. It comes off as forced or trying too hard.
It’s more important to get experience to know what to do, how to handle different situations and contexts, and understand the many different types of women out there and most importantly, what your type is. So the best technique is to “just do it” and learn about yourself as you go. Authenticity and confidence is more attractive to women than any line you could use on them. I know this isn’t the answer you’re looking for but I don’t claim to have a formula either, because there isn’t one.
Rank the European race of women from hottest to least hottest
Slavics, Scandinavians, Meds then Anglos. There isn’t an ugly race in Europe but there is an order of hotness.
opinion on the pope and the catholic position on sex?
I think the Pope is a communist. I think the Catholic position on sex optimizes towards family formation for the sake of it. Anyone can start a family, not everyone can find true love and raise children in a loving home. It’s incompatible with the real world. I don’t see much use for it.
Advice
Med, what do you think is the best way to move past bad heartbreak as a man? I've dated, worked out, read, improved, etc but haven't been able to shake it yet
I wish you would have told me how long it’s been, but time is the only thing that truly heals heartbreak. All of the things you listed accelerate the process but you can’t control how long it’s going to take. Talking to other women helps accelerate it also, I would start doing that. Also make sure you have her social media blocked everywhere and aren’t talking to her anymore. Be strict about that.
A good indicator of moving on is if you’re thinking about her less often and the feelings are less intense over time. It could take a long time depending on how close you were and how long you were together. I’m sorry you’re going through this but I promise it will eventually get better.
What is your advice to a young man looking to become better with woman?
I don’t like giving such general advice because each man is different but there is definitely a checklist I’d run through. Do you have your life together? Meaning, do you have a job and are doing everything you can to make more money? Are you taking care of yourself? Are you eating well and going to the gym often? Do you have a good group of friends? Are you putting yourself in social situations? Even if you go at it alone? Do you dress well? Are you put together? Do you make sure you look good before you leave the house? Do you have good hygiene? Is your home clean? Are you making an effort to spend less time online and get as much experience in the real world as possible?
I can run through a list of things that definitely don’t help. Hating women doesn’t help. Blaming women and society and the government doesn’t help. Not going out doesn’t help. Looking sloppy doesn’t help. Being too ideological or rigid or puritanical doesn’t help. Expecting love or sex from women doesn’t help.
I can run through a list of things that do help. Being approachable helps — meaning, being high-openness and not appearing judgmental. Knowing how to listen helps, meaning — hearing someone without pushing your advice onto them and just letting them speak. Knowing how to ask questions helps — meaning, actually engaging them in a conversation and wanting to know more about them. Not being afraid of women helps — meaning, if they reject you it isn’t the end of the world and they’re not going to bite your head off (they’re usually pretty sweet about it). Not being desperate helps — meaning, you have standards and will not break them. Being self-aware helps. Having an appetite for risk helps. Telling yourself “don’t be a bitch” on a regular basis helps. Being able to admit when you fucked up and knowing when to take an L helps. Not taking yourself too seriously helps. Being funny and lighthearted REALLY helps. Learning from your mistakes helps.
Your advice for a sensitive young virgin starting college next year
First off I wouldn’t label yourself as “sensitive.” I know it’s a meme on here but it encourages men to be shy and weak. Every man is sensitive to some degree but men should strive to be tough as nails, not let their emotions control them, deal with their problems alone and ask men they trust for advice as a last resort. It doesn’t mean men shouldn’t feel, but to come off to other people as sensitive or identify as such is not something I recommend. Of course you could have just been joking when you said that but I’m covering my bases.
The fact you’re a virgin at 16-18 isn’t a good or a bad thing, so I wouldn’t think much about it. I would focus on going out more, building a solid group of friends who you can trust, and talk to women in person as much as possible. Yes it’s scary and yes you will get rejected many times (every guy does) but building up an immunity to the initial fear will do you wonders long-term.
Any hope for a alphawidow in her early twenties? Not the corny red pill kind but the kind where she genuinely believes she will never find another man that can love, understand, and fuck her like he could. Context: she self-sabotaged the relationship and got rightfully dumped for it.
I’m not sure if a man or a woman sent this question because most women aren’t aware of or are willing to admit when they’ve been alphawidowed. Assuming a woman sent this — the only way you’ll get over him is if you meet a guy who can match or top the guy you can’t stop thinking about. I would filter for men who are like him and filter out ones who aren’t to increase the likelihood of that happening. It isn’t impossible, but isn’t easy. I would also think about why you sabotaged it and figure out how you can prevent that from happening again. I’m sorry that happened.
What would you suggest to young Americans currently longhoused in the suburbs with no hot women or things to do? What types of places should these people go to?
Are there really no hot women? Is there really nothing to do? I’m not saying I’m doubtful that’s the case but usually that’s only the case in rural areas. If you’re in the suburbs and you’re not too far from a city, I would spend more time there when you can. If it is too far, I would take weekend trips to cities you want to see. Anywhere. It doesn’t need to be with anyone else either. Oftentimes these kinds of adventures spark some very fun experiences when you do them alone and are willing to take risks.
how to teach a young gf what her mother should have (elegance, femininity, how not to be a slouch around the house)
This sounds like a pretty long-term investment. Is it worth it?
Mothers are supposed to teach their daughters these things but often they don’t because they don’t have these traits themselves or just aren’t good mothers.
Women are sensitive to men’s opinion of them, so telling a girl what you do and don’t like about her goes a very long way. If she’s doing something you don’t like, tell her one time. Be gentle about it. She will either take it seriously and change for you, because she wants you to want to be with her, or she won’t. If she doesn’t it means she doesn’t actually want to be with you or she’s broken in some way. Either way, I would use your judgment to assess if what you’re expecting is reasonable or too extreme and then think about what you’re willing to compromise on and what you’re not. If things don’t improve, there’s other girls out there.
Restarting a fraternity chapter. Any advice?
I pledged a frat then depledged very quickly because I didn’t like being told what to do. But I have nothing against frats in themselves, they’re needed now more than ever. More men need camaraderie. I don’t have the experience required to give you advice on running one unfortunately.
how do i come to terms with the fact i will never be an ubermensch worthy of bap? (m, 22)
I have no idea what this means but it sounds like you’re being pretty hard on yourself and you should stop that.
Personal Questions / Random Comments
What is your body count?
I’d rather not say.
Favourite drug combination and amounts for peak rizz on a night-out?
This is a pretty complicated concoction but a microdose of shrooms, 2 lines of coke and 2-3 drinks puts me in an excellent state. I don’t do this every time I go out. Usually 2-3 drinks puts me in a good place. I don’t like getting too drunk or feeling/looking sloppy. That’s me though. Everyone responds to substances differently. And be very careful if you’ve never tried any of this stuff before. See how your body reacts to a small amount first.
Blue Gatorade is obviously the beverage of choice for the radiator restraint, but what is Medgold's favorite flavor?
I am a Celsius enjoyer lately and my favorite flavor is lemon-lime, which is also my favorite Gatorade flavor.
What's your crypto portfolio for this bullrun? Only tokens you're hodling in spot
Bitcoin and Ethereum. I also recently built a small Solana position that I don’t plan on selling.
who are your top 5 favorite egirls
I know better than to answer this. But I definitely have 1 :)
If nobody would find out would you blow a guy for 1BILLION USD
No.
Your favorite sex position and why?
It depends on the girl and the chemistry. It feels like having a favorite color. I don’t really think about it. The more ‘lost in the moment’ you are, the better.
Got a timeframe for your book release?
Unfortunately no, I don’t want to commit to a release date. It’s taking me longer than I expected, I’m a bit of a perfectionist when I write.
Name and location of the hottest sex you’ve had?
I’d rather not say.
Why you lie about being 50+?
Because I like to mess with the Twitterati, the small, very pathetic section of Twitter who obsess over the identifies of anonymous posters in group chats and are loose with people’s information and believe every rumor they hear. People like that are easy to play with, so I do. I’ve been doing it in various ways for years.
I really want us to be friends
I don’t know who you are but thank you.
Favorite go-to meal?
I don’t really have a go-to meal. I cook a lot. If I want to make something fast I’ll fry ground beef in a dutch oven with olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper then pour some bone broth over it until it soaks into the beef and cooks out. I’ll make a few pounds of that then leave it in the fridge. I make raw egg smoothies often also. Milk, raw eggs, berries, raw honey, etc.
How’s the book coming on?
Taking longer than expected.
What is your racial background?
I’d rather not say.
Ideal breast shape for a woman
I don’t really think about breast shape. It all comes down to proportion and if they compliment her frame. This is really a matter of personal taste.
Have you ever been to Italy?
Yes.
can I rent you as a father figure
Lol. That’s very nice of you but I’m already being rented.
bear or man
I have no idea what this means.
I love your attitude
Thank you :)
ur so fun to be around
I don’t know if we’ve ever met but thank you :)
What is the maximum of girls you have had in your rotation (currently or in past) and what were the pros and cons?
I’d rather not say the number. Regardless, I don’t think a man can handle more than 3 women at once. And when I say handle, I mean you’re fully present when you’re talking to each of them, you remember what they say, and you can keep track of your dynamic and history with them. You can be sexually attracted to infinite women, but I think a man’s heart has a limit of 3. You can have feelings for up to 3 women at one time and you can even be in love with up to 3 women once. Only True Love limits a man’s heart to 1 woman. It’s extremely rare and there’s a tremendous difference.
You can of course talk to and sleep with more than 3 women at once but the chances you’re genuinely intimate with all of them is very slim.
The main pro is, obviously, you don’t have to go on the hunt for women anymore. Another pro is you can understand what you like and don’t like about each of them and then figure out what it is you want in a woman long-term. You feel like the man and it’s a lot of fun, obviously.
The main con is that one woman is enough to handle on her own. Another con is that the chances of them all being okay with you talking to other women is low. Which means you’ll have to refine your ability to lie. That means keeping track of your lies and remembering which lie you told to who. That isn’t easy. It also means you’ll have to be a good liar. Being a good liar requires the ability to look someone in the eye and say something completely false to them while they trust you enough to believe you. This takes a toll on your soul over time. Especially if you end up hurting a woman you care about, which you probably will.